The Myth of Having it All // Personal Post

Some days, I am a total boss lady. I make it to meetings early, I book my clients, and I nail everything on my to do list. My social media is scheduled (at peak hours – natch), my editing is ahead of schedule, and I am the queen of small business.

Some days, I am a totally awesome person. I cuddle my kitty and take my dog to the park, I meet friends for coffee, run all my errands, and hit my step goal. My house is clean and my laundry is folded. I read my books and return them to the library on time. I have dinner planned out and I make eat at a reasonable hour. I am a domestic diva.

These two things never happen on the same day. In fact, rarely am I a domestic diva and a small business queen in the same week. Usually, I’m struggling along, juggling all the things in life, and dropping those balls left and right. I never feel like I have it all, because I never feel like I can do it all at the same time.

And the guilt is enormous. Why do we put this much pressure on ourselves – as business owners, as women, as people – to be perfect? I can tell you that, when you add in a mostly DIY home renovation, my husband doesn’t feel like he has it all either. Every day, it’s a question of time. And there are not enough hours, and none of us have enough brain space to do it all – or have it all – at the same time. Do we work on that house project, or do I cross something of my never ending business to do list? Do I meet up with a friend for happy hour, or make it to the gym?

In the summer, I am a workaholic. My house is a disaster, and while I love spending time with friends, I spend every spare minute with my spouse or desperately catching up on sleep. In the winter, my work load slows down, but that means I finally have time to catch up on all the half finished house projects, and to do some of the things I want to do around my home. I read books and remember what it’s like to have free time. And when I travel, I simultaneously try to enjoy as much of my trip as possible while still working my butt off to run the business. True fact: unless I’m overseas or off the grid, I don’t set an out of office message, because I’m still working. On vacation! That probably means it’s not really much of a vacation, does it? :(

It’s easy to look at a social media feed and think someone has it all. After all, I’m not sharing my messy, doesn’t have walls, house photos. I’m sharing the ones where I’ve nailed it. You don’t know that I barely slept last night, because I was trying to get work done, just that my emails are answered. Today it’s Friday, and I’ve spent the whole week tackling my inbox, trying to get that under control. I’ve barely turned around from my desk, because I know my house is a disaster zone. But hey, my inbox is down to TWO emails….for the next five minutes. ;)

You’ve can have it all, but you can’t have it all at the same time. To paraphrase a popular entrepreneurial saying: family, friends, work, sleep, fitness, or home renovation — pick three. And when I throw a baby in there, I wonder to myself, how can I make it all work? I can’t. And I have to learn to show myself more grace with that. I have to realize that some days – or weeks – I’m going to pick sleep over my house or fitness or friends. And that’s okay. And some days, my business comes first. But other days, my family and my friends are first.

You can’t have it all at the same time, and I think it’s important for us to continue to say that. It may look otherwise on the internet, but I am here to say I don’t have it all. I drop the ball. I work late, and sometimes I don’t feel like I can do enough work to keep up. Some days I am a terrible spouse and friend. Other days, I do great at that, but feel like I have failed as a business owner. You don’t need to have it all, and you shouldn’t believe that it’s a good standard to work towards. Be honest, be real, and give yourself grace. I struggle with this every day, and I know it won’t get easier as my business and family grow.

Delos Archaeological Site Greek Island // Emily Wenzel Photography

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Alexis — Central Valley Senior Session // Spokane High School Senior Photography

Last month, I did Alexis’s senior photos at Manito, and she rocked them! Alexis is such a sweet, laid back, girl, and I was so thrilled to be a part of her senior year. Alexis has such a good sense of style, I can’t believe how different seniors are now from when I was in high school! All my photos were done in a studio, and things weren’t nearly as fun, trust me. We traipsed through Manito Park for this Central Valley High School senior, and just like every other time I’ve shot there, I’ve found another little spot that I love to shoot. Spokane has such wonderful parks, I’m constantly amazed at how beautiful our city is. Alexis, best of luck with your senior year — and everything you do beyond it! I know it’s going to be such a great year for you!!

2017 Seniors: I have a little bit of space left in October for sessions, so if you need to get those photos done before the yearbook deadlines, get in touch ASAP. 2018 seniors, I know you’re just juniors right now, but let’s chat about getting you on the books for spring — it’ll be here before you know it!

Spokane Central Valley High School Senior // Emily Wenzel PhotographySpokane Central Valley High School Senior // Emily Wenzel PhotographySpokane Central Valley High School Senior // Emily Wenzel PhotographySpokane Central Valley High School Senior // Emily Wenzel PhotographySpokane Central Valley High School Senior // Emily Wenzel PhotographySpokane Central Valley High School Senior // Emily Wenzel PhotographySpokane Central Valley High School Senior // Emily Wenzel PhotographySpokane Central Valley High School Senior // Emily Wenzel Photography

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The Greek Islands — Mykonos on Film // Greece Photography

My dreams of visiting Greece were two-fold. I wanted to go to Athens, a city with so much history, and I wanted to visit a Greek island or two. Which is how we ended up squeezing way too much stuff into a week in Greece.

We were pretty sure we wanted to hit up the Aegean Sea, and ended up settling on the Cyclades. When it came down to it, we decided on Mykonos. H wanted to be able to go to the beach, and I was hoping to get some SUP in (alas, the winds were pretty high and we figured kite surfing was probably not the best choice for a pregnant lady). Crete and the Ionian Islands were also on our short list.

While Athens smacks you upside the face from the moment you arrive with the depth of its history, it wasn’t until our plane was about to land in Mykonos that I felt like I was about to experience a more real part of Greece. Which is a bit silly, since I don’t think I met someone who actually was from Mykonos in the entire time I was there. The entire island survives off tourism, and I guess the island more or less shuts down from November-April. Insane, right? In the end, Mykonos was a great choice for us, especially since May isn’t the party season yet. We weren’t into the nightlife, and when the cruise ships came into port, we were hanging out on beaches on the other side of the island, cruising around on an ATV (you can rent them everywhere, we just asked our hotel to call someone), or taking a day trip to Delos. We spent just a few days in Mykonos, but it was a wonderful thing. Each morning, we bundled up to combat the stiff sea breeze, and had breakfast with a great view of the ocean, and then we’d traipse down to town before the cruise ships started to dock. Then we’d head off on an adventure somewhere. We got lost in the maze of streets and alleys that make up Mykonos Town, chatted with a Greek-American expat who showed me the most beautiful and expensive sapphire ring I’ve ever seen, and ate so very well.

I’ve always been happiest when we’re on an island, and I dream of someday retiring to an island in the Mediterranean or Caribbean.

Visiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel PhotographyVisiting Mykonos -- Film Photos // Emily Wenzel Photography

 

All photos shot on my Nikon FG-20 with Portra 160, 400, and 800. Prints from this post, and other images from Greece, are available for purchase.

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Hi, I’m Emily!

Based in Spokane, I travel throughout the Pacific Northwest for weddings, portraits, private events, and more. You'll usually find me with a bag of Haribo gummy bears or a chai tea in hand. Thought lately, this little one has kept my hands pretty full....see full bio.

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